Today is my birthday! Happy Birthday to me! I am 52 years old and, most days, I do not feel old. One thing that I have realized over the years is that time goes by very quickly. When I was young, I could not wait to grow up and now that I am past the “grown up” age, I wonder where the time has gone. Sometimes thinking about where the time has gone makes me sad, because I wonder if I have used my time wisely. How do you know? How do you measure a lifetime? Those are some big questions to reflect upon on a big day.
How do you know if you have used your time wisely? Well, what do you remember about the time that you have had? Do you remember good things, bad times, or missed opportunities? For me, it depends upon the mood that I am in. Today, I am in a reflective mood and I remember a little bit of everything. For example, I remember a job opportunity that I past up that I probably should have given more consideration to and it makes me a bit sad, but when I look at what happened to me because I bypassed it, I am glad at where I am in my life. Yes, there have been some sad times, but even in those times, I have grown a bit more through the experience. Would I like some of them back, maybe, but they are important to who I am and I am not certain that I would want to change who I am.
How do you measure a lifetime? Well, the first question is “compared to what or who?” If I pick a “who”, like Bill Gates, am I comparing myself to him as a billionaire, or as a philanthropist? Boy, either way, those are big shoes to fill. If I compared myself to Bill Gates, I feel pretty small, but deep down, I know I am not Bill Gates and feel that comparing myself to him is not fair and makes me wonder if I should be comparing myself to anybody else?
What is good about comparing myself to Bill Gates is to know that it is possible. It is possible to be a billionaire and I can do more as a philanthropist. I do not have to compare myself to him as an equal, but it does help to use the comparison as an example of what might be possible. It does help me expand what might be possible for me. It seems fair to use the comparison in this light.
So, who can I really compare myself to? If we consider that we are all individuals, then I can only really compare myself to myself. Ok,how do I measure up? First, I think that we need to try and find ourselves, not that I think that we are lost, but sometimes we hide who we really are in the world. For me, I have hidden myself behind wanting everybody to like me. Somewhere in my past, I believed that my behaviour was bad and it would be better not to be me, but to make people like me. I have been working on myself to become more of me versus more of what I think people would like to see from me and I like to consider myself recovering and doing much better. Heck, I do not think that I could have written a book in the past year worrying about what people think of me.
Also for me, another area that I am working on is being present in the moment. When I am really present, beautiful things happen. Beautiful connections, beautiful insights, and I feel like I am living more. Like the being liked, I am doing better each day.
Overall, I am getting better and that makes me feel good. I think we can all do better because with each experience it allows us to feel more and be more, more of who we are. Will we ever get there, I doubt it because once we think we are there, there will always be something more that we can become. I guess the joy is in the experiences along the way.
I am going to have a Happy Birthday today. I am going to be me and present and see where the day takes me. I know that it is my birthday, but I wish all of you a wonderful day. Be you and be present in your day.
Feel free to leave a comment below and let me know if you would like to have a conversation with me.